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Looking Back

by CR Ensemble

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1.
Algea 04:11
You'll walk all night long and we'll wait all night long for you to come back home Cuz you'll never come home (Come home come home please come home) We're still waiting Because you're lying crumpled on the ground (Get up get up please get up) Waiting for They flip on the lights and put you on the ride that took you from all of us Cuz you'll never come home (Come home come home please come home) We're still waiting Because you're lying In your final bed (Don't go don't go please don't go) Waiting for
2.
Tonight I wash you out of my sheets Got you out of my clothes Forgotten your taste and the color of spring So I'm back to waiting for the dawn of summer for the beginning of warmth from the next daylight In the beginning it wasn't right I needed more than you could give I needed you to keep me warm Not be like the fall Moving on with the change of seasons and stormy weather The air is getting colder the same that I exhale The same that freezes my chest and the last thoughts of you Of you, oh you, oh you Whoa
3.
Ocean Bed 04:00
I've been sinking in between sheets and salty skies fell through as my eyes closed me in this dream, this dream I've gotta be asleep Been swimming in the ocean all night long buried Under swells of ocean waves Floating through these hazy days We could be here always I'm still here in the same place I started out tonight Don't know where I am, it's vivid like a film I've gotta be asleep Been swimming in the ocean all night long buried Under swells of ocean waves Floating through these hazy days We could be here always Go on, and on
4.
Gone 03:10
When they've all gone, left you in silence You'll find a chest heavy with loneliness Don't hang your head This you'll find to be your finest hour So find solace in what is brought to light Most aren't used to being this intimate With solitude distract yourself for fear of What to become This you'll find to be your finest hour So find solace in what is brought to light Don't turn on yourself, you could be your own worst enemy
5.
Storm 03:59
Coming together and it's all but October now Going since July and we're just getting on a roll Got new dynamics far from the ones before Lay down the strings but we can't get it from the mouth Where do we go from here We have been stuck in a loop of doing what comes easy Why not break the pattern of our solid past Falling apart and it's all but October now Going for a year but we never got compromise Bitter dynamics far from the ones before Lay down the knives just silence all the chords Where do we go from here We have been stuck in a loop of doing what comes easy Why not break the pattern of our solid past It's too late for what's past I can't keep looking back we were right For the time it couldn't last as it was we had to have resolution
6.
Dropping off a towel with a wet head Polished bodies, sit back and let it go We'll wait for you to be ok Don't you stop talking and don't you ever leave Until it's time to pass you by, sit back and let it go We'll wait for you to be ok With lusty eyes and rhythmic beats You kept us in check now so long
7.
You Say 04:34
You say get over it and I say I will It's not so easy to turn it off I will I need to cuz it's killing me I am over it I swear I am over it I don't want to get over it Let me be with you You say it's premature and I say I feel it That's all that matters to me And I say I'll try my best to make the best of what's left of us I am over it I swear I am over it I don't want to get over it Let me be with you What did you see in me and what piece is now missing I feel the same I miss you the most, so let me close Let me close, I am stronger now, I swear
8.
Looking Back 04:18
I meant it when I said I will take you any way I Can get you, ohhhh If this is the only way that I can see you every day Than this will have to do The man that wins your heart is a lucky one Yeah the one that wins your heart I hope he reminds you of me if just a bit Cuz I didn't mean to fall so hard for you it just seems I love all that you do I meant it when I said I will take you any way I Can get you, ohhhh If this is the only way that I can see you every day Than this will have to do I don't want you to feel Horrible about what you don't feel for me It's best not to fake it for you or for me Cuz I didn't mean to fall so hard for you it just seems I love all that you do Even though this has been painful I am grateful to you for it showed me something I hadn't felt in years it was good to know I still had it in me I meant it when I said I will take you any way I Can get you, ohhhh If this is the only way that I can see you every day Than this will have to do
9.
As You Know 02:29
I didn't think I would miss you But as you know I am wrong sometimes Living alone can be lonely When you are used to having someone I didn't make a sound when you walked out the door It doesn't mean that I regret the choice I made It worked while it lasted I know you had good intentions Trying to do what was best for you But I couldn't be your daddy And as you know did what's best I didn't make a sound when you walked out the door It doesn't mean that I regret the choice I made It worked while it lasted But it ran the course
10.
Elias 03:20
On a Sanday morning in his bedroom More alone than ever before He goes to battle, a belt and his wits To face what we all will some day, just not today He's a little early to make his departure His soul more still than ever before He's resting easy in his bedroom On this Sunday morning so long Friend so long Ohhhh Ahhhhh
11.
Waiting 03:00
I've been waiting for you tonight while you Waste all of my time on god knows what you do It is over and this time admit that you're sleeping around I was always waiting to be the one let down There's been nothing to go on lately from you I'll make my own time now that you're not here It is over and this time I'll be the one to end it I was always waiting now I am drawing the curtain Where have you been and who's bed have you been in tonight It's over now and I couldn't be better without
12.
The End 01:13

about

This is a group of songs I've written and recorded between 2004 and 2013. Algea, Love in 10 minutes, and You Say are the first songs I ever recorded myself with the majority of these tracks between three of my home studio set ups.

These songs are about death, loss, breakups, self help, and dreams. It's titled looking back not only in that they are older pieces but that a lot of the narratives are also looking backward.

"Looking back" was engineered and mixed by Ryan Bohac when I hadn't yet had a home studio and I consider him my first recording daddy. Thank you for all of your lessons. As with several of my other records I decided to remix what was posted on Soundcloud for years into a collection to be release on Bandcamp and other streaming services.

credits

released August 31, 2023

Written, performed, engineered, mixed and mastered by Colin Redmond
Photo and editing by Colin Redmond with consulting from Matt Wiggins

Ryan Bohac - Engineering, mixing, shaker, and vocals on Looking Back
Kevin Waldrop - French Horn on Gone
Rachel Hrdina - Vocals on Ocean Bed

This album is for my dad Steve Foster that broke the rules and got me a bass anyway when I was 13. RIP papa, miss ya <3

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CR Ensemble Eugene, Oregon

CR Ensemble (Colin Redmond) is a solo production and writing project originally from Anchorage, Alaska. Engineered, mixed, and mastered in various stages of learning the ropes in home recording as well as making music while traveling.

Colin Redmond is associated with acts such as Le Rev, Deja View, Paris Green, Japanese Breakfast, and many other projects over the years.
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